God has certainly had a lot to tell me recently. The song ‘Better Than A Hallelujah‘ by Amy Grant was on my mind all week long. I just could not get it out of my head, nor could I hear it too many times. I love this song, and the message it sends! It is such a simple song, packed with so much truth, and has been so special to me given all the circumstances. So, as if God hasn’t been speaking to my heart enough lately…guess what song was featured for our music special Sunday morning at church! Yup, that very song. A lady at church sang this beautiful song Sunday morning. As soon as the first measure began, tears came to my eyes. I knew God was there! Most of all, I knew God was there to meet with me that day. Since this is such a special song to me, I wanted to share it with you all!
Hope you enjoy!
On Sunday morning, Bro Philip preached a message about Jonah. He talked about how Jonah had been running for God. Jonah thought he could hide from God. God continued trying to get Jonah’s attention, wanting Jonah to repent, but Jonah just would not do it. He would have rather died than to repent! This is what got Jonah thrown overboard the ship, and how he found himself inside the belly of the fish, or whale. You see, God loves us so much that he chases after us when we run from him. Bro. Philip discussed how the storm in the story also represents our storms in life. When we have sin in our lives, or when we are trying to hide from God, rather than follow his will, he will place storms in our lives in order to get our attention. Maybe it is a marriage falling apart, or illness, or financial struggles, or issues at work, or even our conscience. God designed us so that even when we are pushing him away, we can’t avoid our conscience. God will use all of these things to get us to come back to him. Sometimes we may have storms in our lives, but after we spend time in prayer and looking at our own lives, we realize that we are not the cause of these storms, but maybe our spouse or a family member. Because when someone is going through something, or dealing with issues, it will effect those around that person. But that is really getting into a whole different conversation. As Bro. Philip preached this incredible message, God revealed something to me….I have been running from God. Me! How could that I be?…I talk to God all the time!…I repent even when I say an ugly word, or think an ugly thought! How could I be running, God? How? Then I realized that I hadn’t been running due to sin, but in following God’s will. You see, I made a choice back in the summer to ignore God’s calling and put my child in public school, rather than homeschooling her. We made the choice to do so because we needed money, which meant I went to work and our daughter went off to school. I knew this was not God’s will, but I knew that we needed money and God would understand. Wrong! Immediately once I started working, God started working on my heart and mind. I felt so guilty! Each and every single day I felt guilt and sadness. About a month after I started working is when our daughter was diagnosed with HSP, and I began having to take off work a lot. As time went by, the guilt and sadness continued. Stress added to it, and the last couple of months I began feeling depressed. God was placing all of these storms in my life to get my attention. All he wanted was for us to trust him and follow his will. During these past few months, my husband also found out that he will be soon be out of a job. So needless to say, it is like we have become the modern day Jonah. Of course, last week I left my job to be back at home so that I can be there for my daughter whenever she needs me. Immediately I felt peace in my life. We have some work ahead of us in following God’s will for our lives in order to get all of this mess worked out, but we are on our way. I no longer feel guilty or sad, and I am trusting that God will provide. God spoke to me on Sunday in an incredible way. He truly showed me the error of my ways. We are people of such little faith. We claim to be strong Christians, but the truth of it is, we are human and in the face of struggles and problems in life, we think we are in control and our faith just doesn’t measure up. I know for me, its time for that to change. My theme for 2012 is ‘God is in control!’. I may have to tell myself this a million times a day, but if that is what it takes for me to just trust him and have 100% faith in him, that’s okay with me.
Before Sunday’s message, I would have never even thought of myself as trying to run from God. But boy, what I wrong! My question to you is….are you running from God? If you are….STOP! God is bigger than you are. God is bigger than any and every problem you have. God loves you! Just let go, and stop running! God is faster than you, and smarter than you. You can run from God, but you certainly can’t hide from him.
Thanks for reading! God Bless!